What’s up my beautiful people? “Sistas, how y’all feel? Brothas, y’all alright?” …(sigh) I’ve been listening to Erykah Badu heavily lately and her song Tyrone is stuck in my head. But anyways….big news!
In exactly 10 days I will be embarking on my trip back to California! Yes, back to Cali. I’ve been there once and I fell in love, so now I’m literally trying to go back every chance I get. I won’t be going alone this time though; my mom and my aunt have decided to join me and they love traveling as much as I do. Almost. It’s going to be a week of food, sites, and…food. 3 days in L.A. and 3 days in The Bay. Let’s get it.
To my boss, my friends, and the rest of my family, this trip is essentially my summer vacation. Ciara is putting her life on pause to go have fun on the West side. No biggie. But for me, this trip is actually a pretty big deal (I may or may not be exaggerating. Just bare with me.).
There are 3 things you should know about me: 1) I love art. 2) I love warm weather. 3) I currently do not want to live in Ohio. These 3 things are the driving forces of the ‘planning of my future’. So with this in mind, it’s not hard to believe that living California is my ultimate dream. Art, warm weather, not Ohio….it’s perfect. But it’s a dream. Cali is super expensive, and from past experience I already know that I need to be making serious money to live out there comfortably, because let’s be real, I’m kind of tired of the struggle life. I’m willing to work to get there, but once I get there, I want to be set, you feel me? Now, when it comes to dreams and goals, it’s usually all or nothing for me. Crazy, I know, but that’s what really drives me to do my best and it usually works (it’s how I got my last internship in San Fran). But just in case, I have New York City and Atlanta on my list as back up future destinations. I know what you’re thinking. NYC is cold as heck in the winter, but trust me, it has great opportunities for a media career. I actually really like it there, so I’ll deal. But with Cali on the brain for my future, this trip is way more than just being a site seeing tourist. This is my life, and I need to know if God really has a place for me out West. I’ll be doing some serious thinking and praying, while also having some fun of course.
But who would’ve thought that my excitement would also come with a little fear? I’m afraid that L.A. won’t meet my expectations. I’m afraid that I might try to go back in time and relive my whole 4 month internship experience in just 3 short days. I’m afraid that I’ll be too focused on the future to fully enjoy the present. I’m afraid that my California dream will get crushed before it even begins. I know it may seem like I’m ‘strong’ and ‘courageous’ with these adventures and such, but I’m still human with fears about my journeys just like the next person. But what makes me different is that I don’t let these fears stop me. I rely fully on God for my “super exploring powers” and I feel free to charge straight ahead without looking back because there is no room for fear in the presence of God.
Preparing for this journey just doesn’t stop at the suitcase. I actually have to mentally prepare myself. My fears can come, but then they will have to go. I have to allow myself to be willing to accept God’s plan, whether it lines up with mine or not. And I have to remember to not get so caught up in things that have yet to come, but rather flourish in the current moments I’m blessed with.
10 days in counting. And don’t worry, I’ll be back.
Peace, Love, & Positivity