Hungering and Thirsting: The Guy of my Dreams…Or Not.

 

Matthew 5:6
“Blessed are they which hunger and thirst after righteousness; for they shall be filled.”
Now wait a minute…
Why does the Bible refer to someone who is hungry as “blessed”? I mean, something like “Blessed are those who are full” sounds more fitting don’t ya think? “Blessed are those who have made an all-you-can-eat buffet in their refuge” maybe. Certainly not the one who is hungry. So we think.
What does it mean to be “Hungry” or “Thirsty”
To desire
To crave
To lack needful or desirable elements
To be aggressively ambitious
The Bible describes such people as blessed because they have this yearning, this desire, this CRAVING for righteousness. It is because of these things that eventually they will be filled. They will attain the righteousness (The Spirit of God) that they so earnestly sought after.
In other words, whatever you strongly desire [aggressively seek] you will one day get. That goes for both the good AND the bad. This is why it’s important that we seek things that are apart of the Will of God for our lives and that will contribute to our spiritual growth.  Being that we are human, this proves to be difficult at times! Like… SUPER DIFFICULT.  Trust me, I know.  We have our own wants and desires.  Sometimes we think we know exactly what it is that we need to make us complete. OR, we even THINK we know what the will of God is for our lives, and dive head first into pursing those things; only to find that God had other plans in mind.
The Guy of My Dreams…or Not
I’m secretly hoping the guy I’m writing about doesn’t ever happen to fall upon this post. If he does and is actually reading this right now…Hello! 🙂 No hard feelings, I learned a lot from you. God bless, bud (your identity is concealed for your privacy).
I remember a time during my freshman year of college when I wanted a guy friend to talk to. I wanted someone who was more than a friend but not quite a boyfriend because I wasn’t sure if I was ready for my first relationship (yes, in college and have never had a boyfriend till this day. Awkward).  I simply wanted somone I could chat with; he could send me corny “Good morning” texts and tell me how pretty I was. We could even go on cute dinners and maybe, just maybe, date and then get married and have about three beautiful kids….that escalated rather quickly, BUT this was what I really thought in my mind. Yea, I was THIRSTY lol. I wanted it so bad! But of course I would lie to myself and pretend like “Nah.. Im good. Strong Independent Woman of God right here. Nope. I dont need a man, a man needs ME! Single and loving it. Jesus is my man!!!” But back to the story…
There was this guy that I met later in the semester at a revival my bible study hosts every year. I had seen him a few times before but never really payed him any attention. I guess you could say he was handsome; nice face, VERY athletic build, smooth chocolate skin (I’m laughing to myself as I type this, HA!). Yea, he was handsome. And plus, he could SING. Or should I say SANG. We didn’t say too much that evening as many of us were still coming off that worship high. I do remember exchanging hugs and that was about it. Weeks later we crossed paths again and said hello. He informed me that his phone was now working; this must have been a pick up line because I had no recollection of him ever telling me his phone was broken in the first place. He asked for my number, and without much thought I gave it to him. Now, before you think I just give my number to anyone, just know I didn’t think anything of it because he’d been to my bible study a few times, seemed like a man of God, and he was friendly. So I said hey, what the heck.
Fast forward to the summertime, back in my hometown (2 hours from campus).  I haven’t spoken to this guy since the last semester. Let’s just say I was a little caught off guard by some texts he sent me confessing his “interest” in me. I guess it was nice, but it was definitely a bit much for the FIRST text conversation. Anyways I get a random “Hey” text from this guy, which was a bit shocking because we haven’t spoken ever since I turned him down and avoided him during the school year. I thought I had crushed his manhood or something! Long story short, we started texting. Texting soon led to phone calls, and then to Facetime convos. He was actually a really cool guy. He was pretty funny, talented, and I loved how our conversations never got sexual. Not to mention, he wasn’t bad on the eyes. Being that I traveled and stayed in a different state that summer, we never hung out but he made it a point to talk everyday. I’m pretty sure it was apart of his master plan to win me over (he actually confessed it) but I tried so hard not to fall for him. He’d have to work if he wanted us to even date!
SMXLL

One night I was waiting a phone call from him. He said he would call after his movie was over. Okay, fine. Bored out of my mind, I went on Google and start searching random things. I searched my name, of course. Then I proceed to search his name and city. Lo and behold, what did I find? A MUGSHOT. I literally scream JESUS. What…is going on…? I did some more digging and saw that he was charged for menacing by stalking. I literally almost fainted. Moments later my phone rings, its him but I let it run to voicemail while I collected my thoughts. The next day I accept a phone call from him but don’t say anything about my discovery because I wanted to see if he would ever say anything about it. He didn’t. I try to put it in the back of my mind thinking, “That’s the old him. He’s changed. God doesn’t judge us by our past.” So we continue talking for about two more months. I’m crazy, I know, but remember I was also thirsty! In the course of these months I found out sooo much more. Are you ready?
                                             – That was not the only time he had been arrested.
                                              – He was on medication for bipolar disorder.
                                              – He had previously had episodes of schizophrenia.
                                           – He was still messing around with his ex and a few others.
                                             –  AND he had a potential baby on the way.
Umm….so I’m sure you can imagine the confusion I felt towards my own life. The guy was a mess. How did I meet someone like this? How did I even come to like someone like this?? It was literally almost like a movie! Not to mention he would talk about wanting to MARRY me; we didn’t even date! Eventually I cut ties with him after he confessed to having been with a stripper that attended his church (no joke). At this point I’m thinking, “What is life??” Everything just hit me at that moment and I wondered, “Why am I even still talking to this guy?!” I know, long overdue.
How’s that for your first guy experience?
*Sigh* Memories. Now think about what I am trying to show you with this now hysterical story. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU DESIRE! For a long time, this desire for attention from a guy was put ABOVE God. I placed this want before seeking God, before bettering my relationship with Christ. In the end, I got what I asked for, and it was wrapped in what I thought was a beautiful package. Not only did I get a false alarm of a man, my relationship with Christ was put to the side. You NEVER want to sacrifice your relationship with God for anyone or anything. He will make sure he shows you that it’s not worth it. And He sure did in my case. I’m not saying it’s bad to desire a companion, especially for those who have reached a certain stage in their life. My error was that it was a premature desire; it was all for the wrong reasons AND it was a desire that replaced my want for the things of God.
So folks, make sure you don’t desire certain things prematurely. Above all, make sure you are desiring Jesus first and foremost. When your cravings for other things become greater than your craving for the Lord, they WILL be knocked down. God will show you just how foolish they are.
Do yourself a favor: hunger and thirst after the things of God!
Until Next time,
Omo G

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